Windows XP New Jersey Edition

(This note is for those outside the Garden State)

Dear Consumas:

It has come ta our attention dat a cupola copies of the WINDOWS XP NEW
JOISEY EDITION may have been shipped outsida Joisey. If ya got one a
dese, you may need some help unnerstanin da commands.

Da Joisey edition may be recognized by da unique openin' screen. It
reads; "Windas XP" wit a background pitcha of Hoboken. When yous start
da program, instead of da usual harpy stringy like music, you hear a
little Springsteen. It's also shipped wit a Sopranos screen sava.

PLEASE ALSO NOTE:

* Recycle bin is labeled "Newark"
* My computer is called "My Computa"
* The Inbox is referred to as "Da Trunk"
* Deleted items are referred to as "Wacked", "Erased", or "Rubbed Out"
* Control Panel is known as "The Bosses"
* Performing an "illegal operation" is known as "enhancin da family
business"
* and will actually maximize da program instead of shuttin' it down.
* Hard Drive is referred to as "Da turnpike on da way to da shore"
* Instead of an error message a "You ain't gonna believe dis" pops up

CHANGES IN TERMINOLOGY IN DA JOISEY EDITION:

* OK...........Sure ting
* Cancel......Fugetaboutit
* Reset........Start ova
* Yes............Yeah
* No..............Nah
* Find............Put a contract out on
* Browse........Get a looksee
* Back...........U-Toin
* Help...........Get your own ansa
* Stop............Knock it off
* Start............Move it
* Settings.......Here's da rules

We regret any inconvenience it may have caused if you mistakenly got a
copy of the JOISEY EDITION.

You may return it to Microsoft for a replacement version. YOU GOT A
PROBLEM WIT DAT?

(By da way, spellcheck is a nightmare wit da JOISEY edition dey still
haven't worked out all da bugs)
--
Jay Calderwood
http://jaycalderwood.blogspot.com

Uh huh... hey ladies give me a call...