Tell your worst puns as a tribute to Sewermonger.

The Sad Story of Pete.

Pete was cleaning his backyard one day, when he spotted an old brass lamp
lying on the ground. Pete picked the lamp up, and seeing that it was dirty
and dull, began to shine the brass with his handkerchief.

Immediately, a genie appeared. "I will grant you one wish", said the genie
in a deep voice.

Pete did not have to think twice. "I have a hankering for pumpkin pie",
said Pete. "Can you make me a pie?"

There was a loud clap of thunder and bright flash of light. When the smoke
cleared, it could be seen that the Genie had vanished, and Pete had been
changed into a pumpkin pie.

Pete's sister Mary, who had been watching from a window, was horrified by
what she had seen, and ran outside to help Pete.

While Mary was holding Pete in her arms, her mother called from the doorway.
"Mary! It's time to prepare supper! Shall we have ravioli tonight, or
would you prefer something else?"

Mary stood up, and held Pete in her outstretched arms. "Never mind that!",
cried Mary, "Pete's a pie!"