I discovered over the weekend that I'm dying of the Human Virus. I
apparently contracted it at birth. They seem to think that on average
males live to be about 70 with the virus. Females a bit longer.

It has no real side effects, but is very contagious. Very easily spread
through exploration of carnal knowledge. Some people deliberately
spread the virus knowing it will only result in the death of their

It's also commonly referred to as the human condition. Scientist seem
to think that everybody in the world has it. The only cure that people
are aware of is another virus. Commonly referred to as the vampire
virus. Unfortunately that virus has been extinct since the age of reason.

For those of you who think you might have contracted it please know that
you are not alone. Millions of people around the world share your plight.